Sunday, March 14, 2010

I Was Supposed To Be Doing My Homework...

This has been a helluva week for South Africans - first Winnie Madikizela Mandela's fuck-awesome "interview" (alleged says she) where she dissed everyone from Madiba to Ghandi. That, my dear friends is BALLS. She has oodles of chutzpah. And I think it's important that we stop this idolisation of Mandela - he's a man, he did great work in helping to unite South Africa, yes and he's awesome for not wanting to wreak havoc on the white population of South Africa (although his reasons for that might not necessarily be based on altruism alone, ya'll, the economic factors involved in that demands a functioning and economically vibrant white community), but he's a mna with faults, with foibles, who has been thrice married - that's not a great sign ya'll.

Soon enough we're going to call South Africa Mandela-Land. We have Mandela Square, Mandela Bridge, Nelson Mandela Metropolitan Area, Mandela streets GALORE. I swear, McDonald's is going to give us the McMadiba burger. And that shit will be sold world wide. Oprah's probably first in line for it (you know how she loves the food). What I'm trying to say is that when he dies, shit is going to come out about him, and we're going to have so many people that are disappointed because they've been sold this image of a man who can do no wrong, when at this point, he's probably half cuckoo (he's 92 or something this year) and doesn't remember his wife's name. Guys, it's just the way life goes *cue Janet Jackson*.

So freaking disappointed in Jub Jub the SA hip hop dude who killed 4 kids in a drag racing massacre. He was drunk and strung out on coke at 4pm in the afternoon. WHO DOES THAT? I mean, I can't even joke about that asshat. Although Mini-Cooper might look into banning South African celebs from buying their cars. Mandoza, Jub Jub... they all have Mini's in common. Which leads me to my next question - why are grown-ass men driving Mini Coopers? Yes, It's a CHICK car! I don't give a shit about how fast it goes (although, clearly some drunkards do)

English NHS FAIL: This is Hilarible - Horrible and HILARIOUS. This lady was treated for gout and IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) for 9 MONTHS meanwhile, bitch was preggo! LOL. Shem

On a happier note... THE ECLIPSE TRAILER CAME OUT AND I AM ALL A-SQUEE!
What do we have to look forward to? GRATUITOUS SHIRTLESSNESS! AWESOME VAMPIRE DECAPITATION! FUTILE VAMPIRE FOREPLAY! A GREAT INDIE SOUNDTRACK! What we aren't looking forward to: RPattz's lack of diction. Taylor Lautner's failtastic acting (I don't know if you can even call it that.) KStew's wig (it looks like something left over from one of Beyonce's old weaves) Bryce Dallace Howard taking over the role of Victoria when Rachelle Lefevre was obviously the boss bitch. I mean look at this fierce bitch. Bryce looks like someone's mom. All I can say though, is that after the 30th of June, make sure to take seat protectors to the movies... because there is going to be a lot of teen-splooge on those seats and you don't want to catch anything Twilight related.

Also VERY EXCITED about the Gaga video for Telephone ft Beyonce. YAYS *screams* it's all kind of fierceness. If you want to watch 9 minutes of awesome click here OMG SHE SHOWS US HER FUCKING VAGINA!

I can't say this has been the best week, it's been sad, it's been hard, it's been so fucking hot, I melted into a pile of goo. Yet I've had so much fun: Miss Lebanon was better than Miss South Africa, by FAR! And I got to read poetry and eat chocolate, so it hasn't failed too badly.

I got some new music to listen to: The Strokes ft Regina Spektor: Modern Girls & Old Fashioned Men. Try it out.

Okay be more awesome, all of you.

1 comment:

  1. I heard about this incredible 20something having these intellectual 1 on 1 with some dude from a friend's blog. Someone commented, I think a relative or something and gave out this blog address. Let me say, incredible sh!t. At first I was worried that this 20something was so intense and forgeting to be a youth in these tough times, we only get that chance once.

    But I gotta say, I read you stuff and it's very entertaining and makes an older guy like me look up certain things. Sometimes it leaves me with a slight warmth around the pelvic area coupled with a boyish smile.

    I'm picking up a playful spirit with alot to share with this world, I will surely be coming back for some more. So please give me another hit of mpum_mpum, seems like I'maa fiend now!

    Beautiful writing.

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